Is to be Malaysian

Malaysia is a very unique place. And so are their people. I’ll tell you why:

1. This is a country where the innocents are declared guilty until they’re proven innocent.

2. Not many of their politicians are straight.

3. You can sleep on the job and never get sack as long as you’re in a high position.

4. Petrol price can be raised within a few moments notice.

5. Malaysians are very visual kind of people. Bimbos are treated like goddess, and many prefer beauties rather than brains. So yeah… big boobs and pretty face are the in things.

6. Intellectual conversation are usually limited to tea/mamak-ing session. However, most of the people who spoke intelligently are members of NATO. Anyway, that’s good enough. Most Malaysians don’t like to think and prefers to live in denial and have this ‘wait and see’ attitude.

7. Typical Malaysians are usually forgetful. If you’ve done something bad and wanted people to forget about your dirty deeds, all you need to do is just sue, sue and sue. People will start to loose interest in your sins and looks for something else to talk about.

8. Office politics aplenty. You wanna get a raise? Raise up your skirt and unbutton your shirt a lil bit. You ought to be in luck.

9. The parliament is a dwelling of rude, obnoxious people who hurl insult each other and pat their buttocks, and yet, they expect the brats in school to behave.

10. The mainstream newspaper is as good as tabloid. Who needs to pay for porn and gossip mags when there’s Malaysian newspaper?

11. There’s the Malaysia Boleh attitude. Malaysian can do a lot of amazing thing… largest blogger gathering, biggest roti canai, sail around the world…but they can never stay in the office past 5.01pm without incentives. Malaysia Boleh? Yes, Boleh Blah!

12. Mamak and kopitiam is their best friend.

13. There’s many wannabes in Malaysia. The most apparent ones are Westerners wannabes. They dye their hair blond, bleach their skin, and God knows what else. *sigh* Is this what they call the belacan who dreams to be cheese? LOL…

14. A lot of things can be settled through coffees…. or teas… or Starbucks.

15. Most of the people in Malaysia lives to eat, not eat to live.

16. Not many respect the national anthem. Play the national anthem, and you can see most will yak away, though they’re in a place where they can stand in attention. And not many know what the heck is Federal Constitution and all it’s frameworks.

17. The people are full of contradiction. They claim that God is Supreme… and yet…well, you get the picture. Not many are humbled with this fact, and people are still classified through their skin colours.

18. You can actually get sued for enjoying sex. There is no such thing as privacy.

19. Good people are often misunderstood, and the bad ones are usually hailed.

20. Most appear to be polite and gentle. But they are malicious while driving and have extremely impressive vocabs when they’re on the road.

21. Many claimed to be patriotic, but during football season, most would yell ‘Man U!’, ‘Chelsea’, ‘Liverpool!’ and God knows what else.

22. As long as you know how to make ‘roti canai’, you can do business anywhere.

23. Nasi lemak can be eaten all day long.

24. There’s always freedom of speech. But there’s no freedom after speech.

25. ISPs are like God…they can treat us rotten and provide shitty Internet connection, and yet we’ll still be devoted to them regardless.

26. Double standards is everywhere. Teachers are allowed to reveal about their sex life in public, and yet the students are expected to abstain themselves from sex and pornography.

27. Parents are expected to forgive the police if their kids were accidentally shot by mistake.

28. Wild animals are not only confined to zoos…

29. Politicians are at the humblest and the sweetest during elections.

30. Malaysians tend to try to translate every single thing into their language. Oh, help me God!

And last but not least

It’s this…

Malaysians needs to apply license to sell rice, sugar and many other foodstuff.

Cleffairy: Is to be… Malaysian… this laaaannnddd…. so beautiffffffuuulll~

12 comments

  1. suituapui says:

    2. Not many of their politicians are straight.
    So which are the gay ones? Hahahahahaha!!!!

    Ya, I heard about that and the grocers/small shops here are not going to sell those items anymore as they do not want to apply for the license. They said being controlled items, they do not make much from them anyway….just a few sen. Those in the small towns will have a problem if their village shop has to apply too. They said bigger towns and cities, no problem – the supermarts and hypermarts will still be selling…

    • Cleffairy says:

      LOL… got a few la… but I know Chua Soi Lek is definitely not gay. He’s very straight! 😛

      *sigh* If the sundry shops stop selling these stuff, I’ll be in deep trouble, Cikgu. I don’t go to those big hypermarket often. I tend to buy my stuff in the vicinity of my area…from those small sundry shops. The less choice/goods…the less I’ll be tempted to buy unnecessary stuff. Don’t you agree? Maybe I’m quite old fashion, but I prefer those small sundry shops. Much more convenient and i don’t have to walk so far just to buy certain goods. I hope they really work this things out!

  2. eugene says:

    Hey, i thought here in Malaysia we practise innocent till proven guilty, and not the other way round, right?

    One thing i hate about Malaysia, is that the prices of our cars is damn expensive, and the silly policy of APs here and APs……and making the rich,richer and the poor ..poorer……….

    they say cut subsidy, i agree but we must also get rid of corruption which take millions upon millions of the rakyat;s money..

    • Cleffairy says:

      LOL… I dun think so. Many of us tend to condemn people before they’re convicted for certain crime. US, maybe, but Malaysia? Once you’re caught by the police, you’ll already be damned.

      Well… I guess money makes the world goes round, eh? things just don’t seems to work without corruption.

  3. Caroline says:

    YEA!! EVERYTHING NEED LICENSE!
    lol recently, my boss just applied license for all his dogs but too bad only allowed to get 2 license and he got around 10 of it. :S

  4. ericlee says:

    erm….i don’t think Malaysia mainstream can be compared to porn…at least porn is able to provoke one of my senses while both cannot really provoke me intellectually…LOL

    u missed out that the taxi drivers here decide want to go to the place or not and not the passengers…

    and definitely one of the few countries where BLOWJOBS ARE ACTUALLY ILLEGAL…and yet not much ppl are aware of it

    Malaysia will like to share every single spotlight and attention they can get even by force and shamelessly if some Malaysian make some news overseas…examples are how one of David Beckham’s mistress used to study here, how Vijay Singh used to “want to apply as Malaysian citizen but got rejected”, Jimmy Choo. Period. And the list goes on

    still got many to list but…that’s all for now…XD

  5. Garfield says:

    As long as you can sing “Kutch Kutch Hota Hei”
    You can become a Dato’ in Malaysia.

    While Malaysian who work like hell in humanity works, they can only get the award after they die. That if they are lucky enough.

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