Wicked, twisted and wacky fairy tale

Again, yours truly is in the mood for fiery tales. This time, it’s all about Snow War and his wicked witch stepmother, the Sleepy Witch. So, here goes, children, drink your milk and get in bed while I lull you to sleep with one of a very famous fairy tale of all times.

Once upon a time, there live a not so handsome prince, Snow War. He may be not so handsome, but he’s well loved and a very powerful prince among his people in his kingdom that his stepmother, Queen Sleepy Witch gets very jealous of his popularity.

Queen Sleepy Witch is not so popular among her people because ever since the old king has passed away, she’s been doing nothing but sleep,sleep and sleep and allows her filthy son, a punk horseback racer wannabe to mess up the kingdom. After a good while, the kingdom is pretty much neglected and she finally realized that she could not afford to buy her favourite toy, the Magic Mirror from a kingdom far far away. She decided that she must raised the price of all apple in her kingdom so that she can earn more and buy herself a magnificent magic mirror for herself to look at. And so, she decided.

And so she raised the price of all apples in her kingdom by 70 gold leaves each, making all of her people hate her very much, and her people will stop at nothing to throw rotten eggs and squishy tomatoes at her and get her down from the throne, and replace her with her not so handsome stepson, Prince Snow War. People had hoped that Prince Snow War would make a difference in their declining and sinking kingdom, and Prince Snow War had given his words to the people that the very next day he sits on the throne, he will ensure the the price of apples would be dropped by 50 gold leaves so that the people can continue to enjoy baking and eating delicious apple pies every day without burning a big hole in their pocket.

The people had no chance of getting rid of the wicked queen, but one fine day, came a fairy godmother who announced that there will be a Royalty Idol, where the winner can win themselves a huge luxurious castle, complete with a harem of beautiful and skillful slave boys and girls as well as loads of fluffy pillows made from finest duck feathers and water bed for the winners to sleep on. All they need to do is sing and parade themselves on the stage every week, and earn sms votes from the citizens. The ones with highest sms votes will win the Royal Idol.

Now, both Queen Sleepy Witch and Prince Snow War are both tempted with the price the Royalty Idol had to offer, and so, they enroll themselves in the competition, giving their best shot, and luck is on their side, they both made it to final.

It’s final round, and both Queen Sleepy Witch and Prince Snow War realized that if they want to win, they must not just use their sexual appeal, because some of the sms voters are quite immune to beauty. Both wanted to win, and being the jealous and wicked witch, Queen Sleepy Witch seek advice from her Evil magic Mirror on how to win the Royal idol. The Evil Magic Mirror told the queen that if she want to win, she’ll have to play dirty. And so, the sleepyhead queen decided to listen to her evil Magic Mirror and play dirty.

The queen will stop at nothing until she win the Royal Idol, and so, she hired a court jester to spread horrible saying that Prince Snow War loves to play with people’s asshole. The court jester toured around the kingdom and scream his head off trying to convinced people that a prince who loves to play with other people’s asshole is not worth wasting a vote on during the Royalty Idol. But it seems that the people are not convinced with the rumours that the court jester is spreading, and the queen gets pretty agitated. So she sent her punk son’s people to create havoc in Prince Snow War’s weekly concert so that people will not dare to vote for Prince Snow War but no avail.

Realizing that spreading rumours about Prince Snow War and making havoc in his concerts can’t make her earn more votes, she decided to ‘bribe’ the citizens by announcing Apple Relief Plan, where she lowered the price of apples by measly 15 gold leaves 3 days before the Royal Idol competition, in hopes that she will get more votes in comparison to Prince Snow War and finally win the Royal Idol and all of it’s galore.

The queen didn’t really want to lower down the apple price, but she figured, what the heck, she can always readjust the price again during the yearly kingdom budgeting event, and it’s four days after the Royal Idol competition end. She figured that if she loose in the competition, she can always get back at the citizens for voting for Prince Snow War instead of her by raising the apple price again during the budgeting day, after all, no matter what, whether she win or loose in the Royal Idol, the throne is still hers to keep.

My advice to all of those sms voters who will need to make your decision tomorrow, please choose wisely. Our pocket is at stake. Let’s stay tune on who will win the Royal Idol tomorrow, and in the meantime, tuck in, and get a good night sleep, children. Sweet dreams.

Cleffairy: Excuse me while I go and stock up on apples so that I can continue having nice and sweet apple pies at a slightly reduced price before some wicked queen decided to make it more expensive again.


  1. cleffairy says:

    My conscience suddenly slapped me. Someone should ban me from creating more twisted fairy tales… LOL…kids will probably get awful nightmares…but then again…seeing how things are going on in Malaysia these days, I think there are more twisted fairy tales in stores…involving ugly old princes and queens. LOL.

  2. KevinP says:

    This is what fairy tales evolve into when you grow up… fiery tales which in turn causes you to get constant nightmares… :).

    But BRAVO Girl! Good one.. 🙂

    I need them apples too…

  3. cleffairy says:

    LOL… Kevin, better stock up on some apples la, just in case. budget is in a few more days, and if you’re smoker or drinker, stock up on those alcohol as well s ciggs too. Sure raise price wan. 🙁

    U-jean…obviously the queen sleep a lot… because we only can see the queen’s rubbish cleaner going around explaining the queen’s mess. And yeah, I just got back from work and heard that the Prince has won, quite a big majority summore.

    Seng, dun find gf as plump as apple can liao. The body shape round round wan. Haha.

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