All right, sometimes, too much of sweet things can be sickening, won’t you agree with me? I mean, if you take too much sweet things, you’d feel queasy and you have a very high chance that you’ll be diabetic too if you take too much sweet things for long term.
So, to balance out, you need to watch what you eat, and… read. LOL. I read too much sweet romantic things sometimes that I get really immune to those passionate scenes and whatnot. Some romance book make me fall asleep. Some chic-lit really bore me.
Anyway, enough ramblings. Not long ago, Mamarazzi lend me some books… they’re all evil reads. Thrilling, and humourous… the kind of book that can make you laugh when you read them… cuz they’re just pure evil.
These days… if there’s long holidays, I try to catch up with my readings, and so… here’s some reviews for evil books.
Divorced and Deadly by Josephine Cox
As far as I’m concern, Josephine Cox is well known for her romance novels, but I guess she’s trying to look at things in different light through Divorced and Deadly. I’m glad she did. 😀 This book brought so much laughter and joy… well, at least to me. This story… uh… tells us how obnoxious and clueless men can be, and how shrew and vengeful women can be. *faint*
This book is told in diary form of Ben, newly divorced with Laura. The man can’t seems to get it why Laura is so pissed when he was caught having sex with some unknown women on their bed when she’s not around. He can’t seems to understand that, not when earlier on in their marriage, Laura forgave him for sleeping with her best friend. (Laura punched her best friend and gave her best friend a black eye for sleeping around with her husband). He really don’t understand it. Why his ex wife can forgive him for sleeping around with her best friend and yet divorced him because he had some uh…fun with some common whore he picked up at the pub.
Thinking that he could survived without her (which he can’t) he ended jobless, and moved in with his parents, and all rotten antics ensues…. cuz his ex-wife, being a female ruled by her hormones, will simply not let him off the hook. Even though she’s done with him, she just want him to have a miserable life for all the things that he did to wrong her. She doesn’t want him anymore, and yet, she doesn’t want anyone to have him either. (GO LAURA, YOU ROCK I SUPPORT YOU!)
Truthfully, this is a really funny read, despite of the horrendous title. There’s a moral in this story, though: Some men… will take things for granted. Forgive them for the first time, and they’ll wrong you again. And therefore, keep it in mind that some men cannot be forgiven, cuz they’ll keep do the same thing over, and over again! And men… cannot be trusted 100%. And if a man wants a moral from the story… well, let’s just say, don’t ever offend your wife. You’ll never know what she’ll do to you. (Hey, I’m a woman, ruled by my hormone, of course I think like this!)
Okay, after spending 2 hours reading Divorced and Deadly… it’s time to read Revenge is Sweet by Claire Gillman.The cover where the scissors cutting the tie says it all. Another hilarious read that will guarantee you to roll on the floor laughing for hours.
Revenge is Sweet is a packed with tales of remarkable lengths people have gone in order to wreak their revenge. Sometimes on pure impulse, sometimes deliberated after years of resentment…and many more.
Let me quote something from the book:
1. Wedding Anniversary Sex
A husband and his wife had a bitter qurrel on their 40th Anniversary day. The husband yelled ” When you die, I’m going to get a headstone that reads ‘Here Lies My Wife-Cold As Ever’ ”
“Yeah” she replied. “When you died, I’m going to get a headstone that reads: ‘Here Lies My Husband-Stiff At Last”
2. Bedside Vigil
Jake was dying. His wife, Becky, was maintaining a candle-light vigil by his side. She held his fragile hand, tears running down her face. Her praying roused him from his slumber; he looked up and his pale lips began to move slightly.
“Becky, my darling,” he whispered.
“Hush, my love, rest, don’t talk.” she said.
He was insistent. “Becky, I have something that I must confess.”
“There’s nothing to confess. Everything is all right, go to sleep.” she said.
“No, no. I must die in peace, Becky. I… i slept with your sister, your best friend, her best friend, and your mother!”
“I know sweetheart.” whispered Becky.
“Let the poison work.” she added.
Revenge is Sweet is a lovely, hilarious read. A good guide for revenge too. 😀 Wanna get back at your boss without getting caught? Wanna get back at your husband for cheating on you? Wanna get back at your wife for two-timing you? This is the book to read!
Okay… I know I’ve been really naughty… so to balance out… I try to be a bit sweet at the end… you know, picking up a good poem book…but… I can’t resist reading this one:
The author of You Die;I Die must have a very twisted sense of humour. Despite of the terrible title that suggested murder, this book contains poems symbolizing the immortality of love and at times its fickleness. Moral of the story? Never ever judge a book by it’s cover. LOL.
Cleffairy: ‘And where the offense is, let the great axe fall’- Macbeth, William Shakespeare (1564-1616).