I have always wonder how it’s like to have a daughter. But I guess, I’ll never find out, because I’m not blessed with one. At least, not one that lives. I have always imagined myself as a mother to a little girl, an little carbon copy of myself when I was younger…

A happy, active and playful child who have her little fingers wrapped around everyone in the family. A precious little princess whom you can deny nothing and a confidant whenever I need a listening ear….daddy’s little princess and mummy’s best girlfriend. I have been a privileged daughter. My family loves me unconditionally and naturally…I would want to give birth to a daughter whom will be loved equally the same way if not more.

But I guess…God knows better and have better plans for me. There are things I’ll never know, and not meant to find out. Perhaps…I’m not meant to be a mother to a daddy’s little girl. Perhaps…God knows much better than me and have better plans, and so He gave me a son instead…a son whom will always take my side and be my protector even if the world turn against me.

Cleffairy: Saying goodbye can be really hard when nobody actually acknowledges the separation.