For The First Time

What do you do when you feel anxious, jittery or even insecure? Well, I used to write whatever I’m not happy about, but there are times that things are too hurtful to even describe and words fail you.

Words seems to fail me a lot these days, and so I take comfort in doing new things. Things that I’m not really good at. Like baking and singing…and traveling. These activities gave me a sense of achievements.

But since I can’t be traveling all the time, so I kinda take comfort in singing and baking these days.

But problem is: I lack self confidence. A lot of things has happened in the past has trampled my self confidence as a woman and as an individual and I’m not quite sure how to fix that. Luckily for me though, I have a group of friends who are very supportive and always give me positive vibes whenever I attempt to conquer my fear. πŸ™‚

Seriously speaking, I’m well known for being a disaster in the kitchen. Baking is always a no-no. But one fine day, I decided to get things right once and for all. I wanted a home bake cake that is edible…not burned and stuff and surprisingly, unlike those who are usually in my circle who tends to tease me and discourage me, these group of friends not only encouraged me, but was rooting for me too. Instead of saying that I’ll probably burn my cake and stuff, they gave me helpful baking tips and encouraged me. πŸ™‚ They sent me such positive vibes through Whatapps Group Chat and that got me pumped up. And the result?


The result was this. I was very happy with the result. The choc cake that I baked turned out lovely. πŸ™‚ It was perfectly done, and kiddo loves it very much that he asked if I would bake more often. Hubby brought it to work and it was polished too. πŸ™‚


Aftee the first succeasful attempt, I decided to bake again as per my son’s request. But instead of chocolate cake, second time around was butter cake. But being one who don’t really like to play by the rules, I decided to take things up a notch abit and added M&Ms to the cake batter. And again…like my first attempt I chit chatted with my Sahabat Media friends as I waited for my cake in the oven.


Again, they sent me positive vibes…and look at the final product. It’s not only fluffy, but colourful. πŸ™‚

So…what’s the moral of the story? Well…to me…positive people will give you positive vibes and inspire you to be a better individual, but toxic people will only bring you down, so it’s best if you cut them out from your life…and if you can’t, just distance yourselves from them. It helps to improve not only your self-esteem, but your quality of life too. Trust me on that. πŸ™‚

Thank you Lia, Pojie, Qaseh,Dik Bee, Wendy and Potia for your encouragements while I was baking. It really means a lot to me

And here’s dedicating a song; ‘Terukir di Bintang by Yuna’ that I sang for fun and posted it up on Facebook but got so much encouragements.

Terukir di Bintang by Cleffairy

I know I sounded awful guys…but thank you regardless…especially to Mama Myn who actually invited me to duet with Iqwal during Carta Blogger 30 on eWana FM a few week back. Hahaha…maybe one day, Mama Myn. Maybe one day in the future. I’m still getting a hang on this. LOL.

Cleffairy: Don’t ever feel guilty for cutting off toxic people from your life, regardless of who they are.


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