Miscarriage vs Abortion

Excuse me awhile while I sniff and sob my head off. A lot of things happened these days and I am very very emotional at the moment, so please pardon my upcoming profanities and thoughts provoking words in the next few paragraph.

Damn, my back carseat is all bloody, and it scares the shit out of me. And I don’t exactly know how to get rid of the bloody stains. Why my carseat is bloody? Oh, no, don’t get me wrong I did not get an abortion or something. A colleague of mine came over to my place to ask me about something this morning, and she suddenly black out and fainted. What’s worst, blood was coming out profusely from her private parts. I was aghast! Completely aghast at the situation. I had known that she was pregnant, as she was boasting it to me happily a couple of weeks ago over lunch with her. She had told me how she took the home pregnancy test and looking forward to the first ultrasound with her husband soon.

Terror hit me when I saw the blood pooling around. My first thought was ” Shit, the baby! Oh god, the baby.” My next action was to scream my head off for the males in my office for help, and unfortunately for us at the moment, my boss was the only male available at the moment and he was a fucking squeamish scardy cat! The girls in my office started to scream as well, and by the looks of it, I was the only one with first aid experience. Damn, why the hell women these days only knows how to bitch about fashion and shopping? I kept asking them to help and they did nothing but stare.

 My boss came to see what the commotion was all about and turn blue at the sight. I practically had to yell at my boss and order him (literally) to help carry her to his car so that we can send her to the nearest clinic, as I figured, my colleague could not wait for an ambulance, and I truly believe that I would endangered her life if we were to delay. Besides, the nearest neo-natal clinic is just 10 minutes away.

And so we did. My boss pick her up while I grabbed her handbag and handphone and we rushed down to his car. But when we finally arrived at my boss’s car, some son of a bitch’s car parked his car behind his car and we couldn’t possibly take his car to send my colleague to the clinic. My boss was completely a wreck, and I had to make a quick thinking and told him just to take my car instead. My damned Kancil would have to do to send her to the nearest antenatal clinic. Well, I told him to drive, if you people must know, because I was too busy bitching and cursing the mother fucker who parked his car behind my boss’s car.

We arrived at the antenatal clinic about 15 minutes later and let the doctor take care of her. I took her phone and contacted her husband and told him what happened, and to my irritation, my boss was practically pacing around as we were waiting for the doctor to come out.

After about 30 minutes or so, the doctor in charge of my colleague came out of the labor room and told us that she had a miscarriage. And they had to performed a complete suction to clean up her womb or she’ll continue to bleed and get horrible infections in her womb, and it’ll take her about 15-30minutes more to snap out of the influence of the drug they used on her during the procedure to remove the dead foetus.

I almost cried out of symphaty for her. While I was tending to my own emotion at the news, my boss asked if we could go and visit her, and the doctor gave us his approval and led us upstairs to where they had wheeled her to.

It shocked me to no end to see that the ward was crowded with young Malay, Indian and Chinese girls. My boss was the blurred at the sight of it, and looked at me questioningly.

“Eh, why are there so many kids here?” he asked, probably completely clueless. I couldn’t help but smirk in disgust before answering him.

“What do you think, boss? Do you see any babies in the nursery?” I asked.

“Err, no…”

“These bitches are probably here for an abortion. What else could it be, duh?”  I said almost rudely and quite loudly, obviously pissed at the fact that while my collegue had truly been looking forward to her baby, these bitches can’t wait to kill theirs!

I was in fury, and I think I had somehow scares my boss off, as he’s usually quite a chatterboxer. Must be he saw the horrible part of me, and decided to shut up instead of disturbing a ‘PMSing’ woman beside him.

Frankly speaking, I had not expect that the clinic to be crowded with bitches who can’t wait to kill their own babies. Well, at least not during weekdays. I had known that these kind of neo-natal clinics does perfom abortion at times, especially during weekends. I had known this not because I had one, but because being a pro-life person, I had chosen the topic “Unwanted pregnancies and abortion among teenagers” during my second year in college as my Public Speaking assignment. And I did extensive research on it, and went as far as to ‘interview’ some slut of a classmate on ‘how is it like’ and ‘where to abort’ and even ‘how much does it cost’.

I sat down and looked around as I cursed yet again. I was doing abit math. 5 Malay girls, 2 Chinese and an Indian girl. Most look around just my age. Then I did a more advance math 8xRM700=RM5600. Fuck. The doctors here earned RM5600 today just by dirtying their hands sucking foetus out of these bitches womb! What a bastard. Man, maths was never my favourite subject, and being able to count this kind of thing is really disturbing.

I concentrated abit harder, and heard muffling sound of these bitches talking to each other and their boyfriends. These are part of the things I heard.

“I takutlah, Yang,” the girl said, sobbing a little bit.

“Tak pe, tak yah takutlah. Sakit sikit je. Sekejap je doktor tu buat.” some bastard behind the privacy of my collegue’s curtain said.

“Tapi, Yang, you tak kesian kat baby ni ke? I takutlah, sakit. Nanti I takleh dapat baby lagi camne?” she asked.

“You jangan risaulah. Kite muda lagi. Nanti bila kite dah keje, dah kawin, baru kite pikir, lagipun, kite dah bayar, kalau you tak buat sekarang, nanti lagi susah. Bapak you mesti halau you punye!” the son of a bitch reasoned. The voices faded as a nurse came and instructed her to walk to the surgery room.

 It had taken me some will to hold my tongue from lashing some cursing at these two people. What the hell!They dare to have sex, and yet they are not willing to be responsible of their action. Why can’t these two people just get married or something? Why must they result to killing their own flesh and blood?

While I was busy with my thoughts, my colleague’s husband arrived, and was told of the news about his wife having a miscarriage. The man had cried, truly heartbroken with the news, as it was their first baby. My boss did the most rational thing he could do. He went to my colleague’shusband and comfort him, telling him to be strong for her sake.

I found myself in tears as I saw my colleague stirring and started to come around. My boss look at them, and went downstairs to request her to be transferred to a private room, as he deem that the ward was truly unsuitable for her, and personally, I agreed with him. Why should my colleague stay in the same room as those bitches who doesn’t want their babies when she probably want to cry in grief and mourn for hers. If she  stay in the same ward as those bitches and heard their conversation, it’ll be a great emotional blow to her.

The nurses transferred her to a private room as my boss and I stood outside of the door, giving the couple the much needed privacy. While we were standing outside, I heard her cry. And her husband tried as hard as he could to comfort her, as he too grieve over the loss of their baby. I shamelessly cried too. Truly saddened by the fact that she had just lost her baby, and she don’t even have a say in it while the bitches who were there that day is there to kill their babies. My colleague had no choice but to sadly say goodbye to hers. But those bitches could keep theirs if they have a heart.

In this modern society, it has become a common practice for unmarried couple to abort their babies in unwanted pregnancy if they think they are not ready to have a baby or not responsible enough to have and raise children. To me,the expulsion of the foetus from the womb intentionally is a sheer coldblood murder, and by sharing this  story with all of you, I hope none of you would result to abortion, no matter what.

After an abortion, many were imprisoned with guilty conscience, especially the woman who had one. And many will try to find ways to amend their mistakes by making offerings to the soul of the baby. But, what good can it make? They had mindlessly killed their unborn child, and nothing they did after that could justify their actions nor could they bring back the baby to life.

Abortion is a sheer murder. I don’t believe in illegal abortion, unless abortion (MTOP) is perfomed legally and strictly in medical terms to save the mother’s life.

And for you pro-choice and irresponsible bastards and bitches out there,please, please, practice safe sex if you decided to have pre-marital/extra-marital sexual intercourse anyway. I can’t stop horny people who wanted to have sex, but I’ll be damned if I don’t remind people to practice safe sex to avoid another life being killed.

Cleffairy: I really do hope my colleague and her husband will eventually heal and survive this, and try to have another baby in the future. It’s so sad to see that while there are countless couples out there who desperately wants children and goes great length to have one, there are people cruel enough to kill their own child.


  1. Hawk Tan says: dating during holidays

    What an experience and I indeed agree with you.


    What? ………Ok ok I know it is no fun and no feel, however think of the consequences and the sin you have committed.

  2. cleffairy says: unicorn dating

    Ohh… you’re still awake, Bro Daniel. And I just found out about your daughter’s bday. Please wish her a belated happy birthday for me. Did you get her the PS3? 😛

    That was an overwhelming event that I never want to experience again. It’s scary, and though I was quite rational and fast in getting my colleague to the nearest antenatal clinic but I must say that I was quite shaken after that, until my boss gave me a day off to clear my head and clean up my car.

    No fun, no feel? *groan* That’s a lame excuse not to protect yourself and youor partner if you just want a fling or one night stand.

  3. free christian filipina dating says:

    what a description… what an experience! this is another lengthy discussion on pro-life and pro-choice….

    Its sad when one can have but dont want.. yet there are others who want but cant have….

    your boss is a man…. who would be clue-less, you have to forgive him la… but I guess u acted on instinct and did the right thing.

  4. cleffairy says:

    That’s the way life goes, isn’t it? When one wants to have something and made an effort, they can easily loose it. But when one does not welcome it and have it, they simply want to get rid of it at all cost.

    My life, is completely like a drama these days…I had no idea that a man can be so clueless and so squeamish seeing blood. I never thought that I’ll be experiencing this sort of thing in my life, period.

    I was terrified back then, my priority was to get her to clinic or hospital asap, and though I can think straight during the whole process, the trauma kinda hit me after everything was over. Haha…I can’t even drive back home and had to ask people to have my carseat settled. 🙁

    And to think that I wanted to be a doctor when I was younger…I thank God I didn’t due to my awful maths… I doubt I will make a good one. Blood and situation like this, does not really sit well with me. The pressure would have been too much for me to handle. LOL.

    But in any case, the rate of abortion among Malays is much higher, and this does not change since a few years back. And I guess because it’s because a child born out of wedlock is stigmatized by the society? Cuz I’ve seen many unwed Chinese couple getting pregnant before they got married, and they act as nothing and most did the right thing and have the baby. And most Chinese parents are more accepting and forgiving than Malays and Indian.

    To me, a child is a child. What difference does it make if they are born out of wedlock or not. They are still human and have the rights to live as a normal human being, do they not? Malaysians are generally still under a ‘tempurung’ and still have orthodox thinking towards this matter. And as long as we still have this sort of thinking, more babies will be aborted every damn day.

  5. ShawnSharif says:

    That’s just it isn’t it?

    Dare to do and have fun but so chicken to take responsibility. Malays in particular. Haha. So easy for me to kutuk my own race. And the saddest part is they never learn.

    I do feel sorry for your colleague. Hope she’ll bounce back & pray she will gat what she truly deserves 😉 Good luck!

  6. cleffairy says:

    HiHi Shawn, thank you for visiting and commenting. I’m not a racist, well, at least not when it comes to Malaysian(I can’t seem to accept illegal immigrants and foreigners for some reason). To me, all Malaysians are equal, but, it’s sad to see that the Malays do these sort of things. The prim and properly behaved Malays seems to be classified as ‘endangered’ species these days. I can only say “Apa nak jadi, ni?”

    And you know what? From some of the conversation that I heard in the ward that day, there’s one Malay girl that did it not for the second time, but already the third! I felt like going to her and slap her for doing so! Hearing that sort of conversation makes me wonder, how many more out there had aborted their baby countlessly like having a loose tooth plucked out?

    Haha… bro Daniel, well… I kinda recovered. My first gory experience was during my journalism years, where one of the first few assignments was to do a coverage on a suicide case. Damned, it was a lot more traumatizing than this. Seeing a dead body with brain juices oozing out a few years ago made me felt sick for one whole week. Never understood why people have guts to commit suicide to this very day. 🙁

    This miscarriage thing is not disgusting, but it’s scary and eye-opening nevertheless, seeing that something so precious can be taken away from you without warning.

    Dang, your lil girl is so lucky! My dad won’t let me have such toys when I was younger. 😛 He give me $$ so that i can buy things that i want with my birthday money. And being a cheapskate…I end up keeping it. 🙁

  7. cleffairy says:

    LOL… hi Pamina. Haven’t seen you around for quite some times. Things are going well for you, I hope… 😀

  8. chit says:

    man, this is some experience huh? witnessing a miscarriage. the blood will surely scare the hell outta me, but i think i will be macho-er than yr boss…hehe. something really unfortunate that could happen to an expecting lady. something out of touch and control. but looking at the bright side, the mom is at least ok. how is she? emmm….

  9. ShawnSharif says:

    Most Malaysians tend to be rigid in their thinking. Yeah true, the couple expecting an outta-wedlock child did screw up big time, but the deed’s done, it can never be erased pun. Like I said, berani buat, berani tanggung la.

    These people never heard of protection eh? Morning after pills?

    A friend of mine told me she got this cctv recording in a toilet showing this young woman giving birth in the toilet & then smothering the child to death before leaving it there! She was in a dinner attire, and she took great pains to ensure that the dress didn’t get dirty. She cleaned herself up, put some make up to disguise her tired and drained face, and simply joined back dinner outside!

    I dunno what to think…

  10. cleffairy says:

    Chit, it’s a traumatizing experience, not because of the blood but the thought of losing someone dear to you in merely a few minutes….but thank God that she’s just in her first trimester. If she were to have a miscarriage during the second, I think I will faint on the spot as well. LOL.

    She’s recuperating, I guess, and she tried to put a brave front, though I know she’s deeply saddened with the incident. Me and other workmates went to visit her during our lunch break. Her family was really supportive, and we even get to see her mother in law fussing over her when we visited her yesterday noon. I think overall she’s doing pretty well now, and will be out of there tomorrow 😛

    Shawn, these people, it’s not that they do not know what is protection, it’s just that they purposely ignore to use it cuz they think they wun be so ‘lucky’ to get pregnant or something. And the girls are simply dumb enough not to demand the protections la! Sendiri gatal and cari pasal! Den when it happens, they simply take the easy way out, cuz the cost of abortion, is actually quite affordable.

    Now I dunno, but a few years ago, I did research for my assignment and it cost around rm650-rm700. Fuck it la…actually abortion is more expensive than giving birth. Giving birth in a clinic like that, with meals included and 3 days stay in the clinic is just rm500-rm600! give birth is actually very cheap in comparison to abortion! For me la, i rather give birth than abort la, why would I be so BOWDOW to kill my own child. Grrr.

    And about the CCTV recording. That bitch who gave birth then kill her child like that is not human. She’s a satan reborn! Even cats and dogs take care of their kittens and puppies lovingly after giving birth! The bicths ought to let the child live, even though duzzin wants the baby. Raise the baby for a moth or so den give it up for adoption or something, since she duzzin want the baby. How could she do that? Heartless whore! Does she not know how many more couples out there live in agony of not being able to have their own child and willing to give anything to have a child to call their own! 🙁

    I used to give pro-life talks to people during my college years, because I’m really anti pro-choice, unless it’s for saving the mom’s life. But seeing today’s society, no amount of talk would make these people more humane!

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