Heart of A Bride

Plenty of people I know are getting married this year…some for the first time…some for the second…and some, intending to get married again.  2014 must be a year filled with love…or lust, for that matter. It doesn’t matter which one. The point is that there’s plenty of bride and bridegrooms to be this year, and most of them are the people I know. If I’m not mistaken, Bro Framestone and Muja Girl wrote a Bahasa Malaysia version of ‘Heart of A Bride’ ; ‘Hati Seorang pengantin’, talking about their feelings about getting married, getting married again and reading about it gives me a little pang in my heart, and here’s my version of it, considering that I’m one of the bridesmaid for my BFF Wendy, who is getting married this upcoming September.

For those who are not married…yet to be married…here’s a little question for you; Do you know how it feels like to be a bride? Men, husbands- to- be, don’t answer that, please. You probably wouldn’t know how it feels like to be a bride, because, obviously, you are not a woman, and unlike men, we  women tends to use our feelings more during the engagement period.

As soon as we decided to say ‘Yes’ and end our life… I mean, end our single life and start a new one with our future husband, we get wacky. We’ll be sensitive, picky, choosy and emotional. We cry alot. Yes, we do. Although not in public. We think a lot and we start having fears. We wondered if we’ll be making the right decisions? We wondered what changes it will bring? Will we still be mummy and daddy’s girl? Will it affect family relationships? We started to think about the future. We wondered…will we be as much as in love like this forever for the rest of our lives? Will we be a good wife? Are we capable of being a good mother? Will these… will these be enough for us? Are we making the right choice?  We worry for a lot of things, but some things are better left unspoken.

There are alot of things that comes to our minds, we have cold feet, and we’re entitled for that. We get nervous, but we can’t really show it. It’s supposed to be a happy occasion, something to celebrate…after all, that’s what weddings are supposed to be; celebration of love, isn’t it? Brides have doubts, and so regardless of what happened throughout the period, we just…continue walking, and moving forward. We brave ourselves, we seek courages and comfort from our girlfriends and hope that this is one thing in our life that we won’t screw up.

Some men remain aloof about wedding preparation even after the initial proposal stage, leaving everything to the ladies to sort it out after that, and that made us wonder if they are really serious about tying the knot with us. Look here, marriage is a journey. Wedding preparation is just a start of a beautiful partnership ahead, so men, please don’t let your bride wonder if you’re having second thoughts and whatnot. Getting married is not just about preparing for a party, reception or selecting  the perfect wedding dress, but a partnership in whole. So if you have any heart at all, be there with her.

I understood a bride’s heart…how she feels. So… as a bridesmaid…I WILL BE THERE for her throughout the journey. She may turned a Bridezilla on me at some point in the future, she may gets emotional and unreasonable at times, but I’ll be there for her, because I understood how she feels like. It is not my own wedding I’m preparing. And it never will be. But I’ll walk her journey and be there as if I would my own.

Not many respect the sanctity of marriage anymore. You can see infidelities everyday and many women choose to turn blind eyes to it, in the name of love, in the name of innocent children. Forever and a day no longer held meaning for me, they’re just…words…mere words, but I’m sure, true love in the purest form exists. I know so. I can see the evidence with my own parents. My dad still holds my mum’s hands whenever they walk, they hug and kiss each other pretty often. They love each other and not afraid to show it, even at their age. They fight, they quarrel, but they made up and don’t hold grudges towards each other.They are petty with each other, they joked with each and play pranks on each other like a bunch of naughty children, but they don’t go to bed angry at each other.

They are faithful to each other, and they promised to grow old and live the rest of their lives together. And they honoured each other. Something… I know a lot of women yearn for, me, included. Something that all mothers would want to show their children. A proper family structure, where they can always be secure with the fact that their parents love each other, and a wonderful memory to grow up with.

Cleffairy: Forever and a day may not be for everyone, but I hope God will bless those who are walking down the aisle, an eternity with each other.





  1. Christopher says:

    Good article. Cleffairy is back !! Haha … been reading a lot of your adventure posts and you are back with your beautiful post full of insight . Thanks for sharing how a lady thinks of marriage and family.

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